{"id":7994,"date":"2014-09-09T22:01:10","date_gmt":"2014-09-09T22:01:10","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/forumarchives.tmsites.net\/index.php\/2014\/09\/09\/i-have-a-job-for-you\/"},"modified":"2014-09-09T22:01:10","modified_gmt":"2014-09-09T22:01:10","slug":"i-have-a-job-for-you","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/crapsclub.goldentouchserver.com\/index.php\/2014\/09\/09\/i-have-a-job-for-you\/","title":{"rendered":"I have a job for you"},"content":{"rendered":"


\nA young man with his pants hanging half off his ass,
\n\ttwo gold front teeth, and a half inch thick gold chain
\n\taround his neck; walked into the local welfare office
\n\tto pick up his check. <\/p>\n

\tHe marched up to the counter and said,
\n\t"Hi. You know, I just H A T E drawing
\n\twelfare. I’d really rather have a job.. I don’t like
\n\ttaking advantage of the system, getting
\n\tsomething for nothing." <\/p>\n

\tThe social worker behind the counter said "Your
\n\ttiming is excellent. We Just got a job opening from a
\n\tvery wealthy old man who wants a chauffeur and
\n\tbodyguard for his beautiful daughter. You’ll have
\n\tto drive around in his 2014 Mercedes-Benz CL, and
\n\the will supply all of your clothes." <\/p>\n

\t"Because of the long hours, meals will be provided.
\n\tYou’ll also be expected to escort the daughter on her
\n\toverseas holiday trips. This is rather awkward to say
\n\tbut you will also have, as part of your job, the
\n\tassignment to satisfy her sexual urges as the
\n\tdaughter is in her mid-20’s and has a rather strong
\n\tsex drive." <\/p>\n

\tThe guy, just plain wide-eyed, said,
\n\t"You’re bullshittin’ me!" <\/p>\n

\tThe social worker said, "Yeah, well…
\n\tYou started it."<\/p>\n

\n

Replies:<\/h3>\n
\n

Posted by:<\/strong> Dr Crapology on September 12, 2014, 3:51 pm<\/p>\n

loved it.<\/p>\n

\tDoc<\/p><\/div>\n<\/div>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

A young man with his pants hanging half off his ass, two gold front teeth, and a half inch thick gold chain around his neck; walked into the local welfare office to pick up his check. He marched up to…<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":14,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"closed","ping_status":"closed","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[20],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-7994","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-humor"],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/crapsclub.goldentouchserver.com\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/7994","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/crapsclub.goldentouchserver.com\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/crapsclub.goldentouchserver.com\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/crapsclub.goldentouchserver.com\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/14"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/crapsclub.goldentouchserver.com\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=7994"}],"version-history":[{"count":0,"href":"https:\/\/crapsclub.goldentouchserver.com\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/7994\/revisions"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/crapsclub.goldentouchserver.com\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=7994"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/crapsclub.goldentouchserver.com\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=7994"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/crapsclub.goldentouchserver.com\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=7994"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}